Miss Manners: We were yelled at in a Paris opera house. Were we in the wrong?

DEAR MISS MANNERS One of the highlights of our trip to Paris was an opera performance at the Palais Garnier The opera M d e by Cherubini is in excess of four hours with two brief intermissions Related Articles Miss Manners Another mother chided me for group-texting a cute photo Was I wrong Miss Manners Can a guest reprimand a dog in its own house Miss Manners Her joke about dodging the check turned out not so funny Miss Manners My fun party event went off the rails when my guest was arrested Miss Manners My fiance s family is upset about the wedding gift situation We were seated in the two front seats of a box in the first loge with three pairs of seats behind us Without an aisle the box occupants must seat themselves in order from front to back to avoid climbing over one another We needed to be seated first and conversely were the last to exit the box During the first intermission we were not able to traverse the distance to the concessions in time to get any refreshments At the second intermission we rushed to purchase une gorg e de champagne et un petit sandwich just in time for the return to your seats bell to ring We hurried back to our seats carrying our treats and unveiled our boxmates waiting for us to take our seats so they could do likewise Our choices seemed to be A have everyone wait while we consumed our refreshments B with no waste receptacles in the vicinity set our items down on the floor to resume our seats or C take the items in with us and finish them before the performance resumed With no ushers or signage available for guidance we selected option C as the the greater part sensible This apparently was incorrect as almost directly a young man from an adjoining box leaned over the railing to shout at us This is the opera This is not done What would Miss Manners suggest as the best class of action Obviously eating before the performance is an option but dining fast in a Paris restaurant is easier mentioned than done GENTLE READER The chief example of rudeness here is shouting admonishments at other opera patrons But although Miss Manners does not believe in starving for art she agrees that an opera house is not a movie theater Even though Handel himself played for parties you would not want to be surrounded by an audience chomping away on popcorn However she is not above smuggling provisions into opera houses Even in Paris it is attainable to buy takeout food that may be consumed during intermission as an alternative to the pricier fare DEAR MISS MANNERS Is it OK to comment on a co-worker s new hairstyle or fashion choices For context I am a man and work mostly with women I would only ever share positive comments such as I like your new hairstyle or I love that jacket I would never share a negative opinion nor would I use my remarks as a way to show romantic interest in the other party Related Articles Dear Abby I m angry that my supermarket has this new rule Asking Eric I m the bride s great-uncle who s going to hell Dear Abby A stranger sneered at my T-shirt and I didn t know what to say Asking Eric My husband s family has this odd rule about naming sons How do I explain it to our kid Harriette Cole Why can t we have a nice anniversary like my friends did GENTLE READER Then don t Perhaps there will be ladies who are charmed And perhaps there will be ladies who feel that they are there to work not to have their looks appraised even favorably Do they comment when you get a haircut Miss Manners suggests you use your charm to comment favorably when your colleagues do especially good work Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website www missmanners com to her email gentlereader missmanners com or through postal mail to Miss Manners Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO